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Jokes for the week of 7/11/2001
Klingons, The French, Sayings and The Subway Newspaper
From the "Oh so true!" File
Here's a hint: Don't give people a piece of your mind. You haven't got any to spare.
And This Saying by Flaubert doesn't lose anything in the translation
"Tout s'en va, tout passe, l'eau coule, et le coeur oublie."
Translation:
Everybody goes, everything passes, the water flushes, and the heartburn goes away.
A PC Owner Haiku well can all agree with
Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.
Received from Poor Innocent Guy Curtis of Tennessee Tech (a New Yorker at Heart):
Newspaper on the Subway
\\|//
(. .)
-----oOOo--(_)--oOOo-----
The scene: The "F" train of the subway line in New York City.
I was commuting from the Borough of Queens to my job in Manhattan. I'd
finished reading the morning paper and was saving it to bring to friends on the
job. How do you save a newspaper on the subway? You sit on it.
A new commuter came in, saw the newspaper under my rear and asked the second
most stupid question I've ever heard (someday I may tell of the first), "Are
you reading that paper?" I stood up, turned the page, sat down on the paper
and answered, "Yes."
Finally Klingon developers - from Humor Break on alt.jokes
Top 10 things likely to be overheard if you
had a Klingon on your software development team:
10) "This code is a piece of drek! You have no honor!"
9) "A TRUE Klingon warrior does not comment his code!"
8) "By filing this bug you have questioned my family honor. Prepare to die!"
7) "You question the worthiness of my Code?! I should kill you where you stand!"
6) "Our competitors are without honor!"
5) "Specs are for the weak and timid!"
4) "This machine is a piece of GAGH! I need dual Pentium processors
if I am to do battle with this code!"
3) "Perhaps it IS a good day to Die! I say we ship it!"
2) "My program has just dumped Stova Core!"
1) "Behold, the keyboard of Kalis! The greatest Klingon code warrior
that ever lived!"
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