If this is not the type jokes you were looking for,
check out our past weekly jokes In our Archives
Jokes for the week of 6/19/2002
Dumb State Laws Pennsylvania to Utah
Dumb Pennsylvania Laws
It is contrary to Pennsylvania law to discharge a gun, cannon, revolver or
other explosive weapon at a wedding.
It is illegal to have over 16 women live in a house together because that
constitutes a brothel. However up to 120 men can live together, without
breaking the law.
It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.
Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile
and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of
livestock, and continue.
A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust
under a rug in a dwelling.
You may not sing in the bathtub.
Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania residents.
A person is not eligible to become Governor if he/she has participated in
a duel.
Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull
well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with
the countryside, and let the horses pass. If the horses appear skittish, the
motorist must take his car apart, piece by piece, and hide it under the
nearest bushes.
Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either the bride
or groom is drunk.
No more than two packages of beer at a time may be purchased, unless
you are buying from an official "beer distributor"
All liquor stores must be run by the state.
Motorized vehicles are not to be sold on Sundays.
You may not catch a fish with your hands.
You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth.
Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish.
Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own land, but a
hunting license is required to hunt on your own land.
Carlisle
In the middle of town, one must pay a fee of $50 dollars a year to park
on a particular block. At night, however, the cars must be moved for street
cleaning. This law is enforced even if snow or ice prevents the cars from
being moved.
Connellsville
One's pants may be worn no lower than five inches below the waist.
Danville
All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires.
Millville
One may not shoot any dog that is found wandering the streets.
The sale of alcohol is prohibited.
Morrisville
It is required that a woman have a permit to wear cosmetics.
Newtown
Every outlet or switch (which can be purchased for 59 cents) that is
installed requires an electrical inspection fee of 1 dollar and 33 cents.
Pittsburgh
It is still illegal to bring a donkey or a mule onto a trolley car.
No one is allowed to sleep on a refrigerator.
Ridley Park
You cannot walk backwards eating peanuts in front of the Barnstormers
Auditorium during a performance.
Tarentum
Horses are not to be tied to parking meters.
Dumb Rhode Island Laws
Rhode Island recently applied to the US Government to make all the
coastal waters of Rhode Island a "No Discharge Zone". The ostensible
purpose was to prohibit the discharge of sewage by boats into the state's
waters. However, discharge of raw sewage into the state waters was
already illegal. What the "No Discharge Zone" actually did was make it
illegal to discharge TREATED sewage from a boat into state waters. What
now happens is that boats (whose treatment systems far outperform
municipal sewage treatment plants) are now required to disable their
sewage treatment systems, and carry their sewage to a shore-based
facility, which then dumps the partially treated sewage back into Rhode
Island's coastal waters.
It is illegal to challenge someone to a duel, or accept a duel, even it it is
never actually fought. Penalty: Imprisonment for one to seven years.
Impersonating a town sealer, auctioneer, corder of wood, or a
fence-viewer is against the law. Penalty: $20 to $100 fine.
It is illegal to place a windmill within twenty-five (25) rods of any traveled
street or road.
Riding a horse over any public highway for the purpose of racing, or
testing the speed of the horse is illegal. Penalty: Maximum $20 fine and
imprisonment for 10 days.
Exercising any labor, business, or work, or using any game, sport, play,
or recreation, or causing any of the above to be done to or by your
children, servants, or apprentices on the first day of the week (Sunday)
results in a penalty of $5 for the first offense and $10 for the second.
Professional sports, except ice polo and hockey, must obtain a license to
play games on Sunday.
Any marriage where either of the parties is an idiot or lunatic is null and
void. -SECTION 11-40-1
It is illegal to coast downhill in your car with your transmission in neutral,
or with the clutch disengaged.
It is considered an offense to throw pickle juice on a trolley.
Newport
You cannot smoke a pipe after sunset.
Providence
There is not an appeals process for exemtion of property tax due to a
disability or poverty.
It is illegal to wear transparent clothing.
You may not sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a
Sunday.
West Warwick
It is illegal to use water on even-numbered days for the sole purpose of
watering plants, gardens, or lawns. If you break this law there is a fine of
$25-$100.
Dumb South Carolina Laws
It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting
suicide.
Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward
off Indian attacks.
It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on
Sundays.
When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven
vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm
into the air to warn horse traffic.
It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a
private club. (Repealed November 2000)
Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.
It is considered an offense to get a tattoo.
Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal.
Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday.
No work may be done on Sunday.
An exception to the above law is that light bulbs may be sold.
All schools must prepare a suitable program for Francis Willard Day.
Dance halls may not operate on Sundays.
Merchandise may not be sold within a half mile of a church unless fruit is
being sold.
Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state.
A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred
people.
Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring
horses.
By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage
must take place.
It is illegal to communicate with a woman using obscene messages.
It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse.
Charleston
It is against the law to drive a motorized vehicle on King Street.
The Fire Department may blow up your house. This law was made so
that the fire department could create a fire brake.
Fountain Inn
Horses are to wear pants at all times.
Lancaster County
It is illegal to dance in public in Lancaster.
Spartanburg
Eating watermelons in the Magnolia Street cemetery is forbidden.
Dumb South Dakota Laws
No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants.
It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an
offensive manner are forbidden.
If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may
shoot them.
Spearfish
If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can
be considered a war party and fired upon.
Dumb Tennessee Laws
You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.
Hollow logs may not be sold.
Any person crippling, killing or in any way destroying a proud female dog
that is running at large shall not be held liable for the damages due to such
killing or destruction.
More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would
constitute a brothel.
It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish.
"Crimes against nature" are prohibited.
Stealing a horse is punishible by hanging.
Driving is not to be done while asleep.
The age of consent is 16, but 12 if the girl is a virgin.
It is legal to gather and consume roadkill.
Dyersburg
It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date.
Fayette County
You may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on a piece of
property.
Lenoir City
When you pull up to a stop sign you must fire a gun out the window to
warn horse carriages that you are coming.
Lexington
No one may eat ice cream on the sidewalk.
Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited.
Knoxville
In front of their buildings, all businesses must have a "hitching post."
Memphis
Illegal for a woman to drive a car unless there is a man either running or
walking in front of it waving a red flag to warn approaching motorists and
pedestrians.
It's illegal for frogs to croak after 11 PM.
Panhandlers must first obtain a $10 permit before begging on the streets
of downtown Memphis. (Passed in 1996)
It is illegal to give any pie to fellow diners. It is also illegal to take
unfinished pie home. All pie must be eaten on the premises. Oneida
An ordinance forbids anyone to sing the song "It Ain't Goin' To Rain No
Mo'."
Dumb Texas Laws
When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come
to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone.
A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first
obtaining a special five-dollar permit.
It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.
You can be legally married by publically introducing a person as your
husband or wife 3 times.
It is illegal to drive without windshield wipers. You don't need a
windshield, but you must have the wipers.
It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel.
It is illegal to milk another person's cow.
A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24
hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the
crime to be committed.
It is unlawful for a person to consume an alcoholic beverage while
operating a motor vehicle upon a public roadway, if the person is observed
doing so by a peace officer.
The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it
contains a formula for making beer at home.
Abilene
It is illegal to idle or loiter anyplace within the corporate limits of the city
for the purpose of flirting or mashing.
Austin
Wire cutters can not be carried in your pocket.
Beaumont
Collegiate football is banned at Lamar University.
Borger
It is against the law to throw confetti, rubber balls, feather dusters, whips
or quirts (riding crop), and explosive firecrackers of any kind.
Clarendon
It is illegal to dust any public building with a feather duster.
Dallas
It's illegal to possess realistic dildos.
El Paso
Churches, hotels, halls of assembly, stores, markets, banking rooms,
railroad depots, and saloons are required to provide spittoons "of a kind
and number to efficiently contain expectorations into them."
Houston
Beer may not be purchased after midnight on a Sunday, but it may be
purchased on Monday.
It is illegal to sell Limburger cheese on Sunday.
Galveston
It is illegal to drive a motor car down Broadway before noon on
Sundays.
Jasper
Dogs must be on a leash at ALL times. Fine of 100 dollars.
LeFors
It is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer while standing.
Lubbock County
It is illegal to drive within an arm's length of alcohol - including alcohol in
someone else's blood stream.
Mesquite
It is illegal for children to have unusual haircuts.
Port Arthur
Obnoxious odors may not be emitted while in an elevator.
Richardson
It is now illegal to place a "for sale" sign on a car if it visible from the
street.
It is illegal to do "U Turns".
San Antonio
It is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes
and/or hands.
It is illegal to urinate on the Alamo.
Temple
No one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square.
You can ride your horse in the saloon.
Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot.
Texarkana
Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights
Check out our past Jokes and Humor In our Archives
You don't like these jokes? Then you take the blame!
Send us some funny ones! We will make sure to give you full credit! :-) |
|
|
|
|
|
|
